Coffee Rhetoric: Truth
Showing posts with label Truth. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Truth. Show all posts

April 05, 2005

T.M.I.

I am happy to report that I think my vibrator will be okay... at least for another few months, anyway. In an earlier post I said that it was sputtering along. I was quite worried, because I already busted my beloved back massager about a year ago. I've only one toy left. I can't be without, sorry. In any event speaking of the vibrating back massager, I don't know who the hell the manufacturers of the back massager think they're fooling. That there is a bonafide poon pleasure- toy. I mean, c'mon... it has a long ribbed handle and the top is rounded off on top. It has three different settings for heat and intensity. That was no back massager... That was the best sex I ever had in my whole entire life. I still mourn that thing 'til this very day. So anyway, I stick to my backup toy, I call it Second String. I thought my pink little second stringer was going to die on me, but I changed the batteries, reassured it a little and it's working fine. I ordered some peppermint scented soap made from coffee grounds off of drugstore.com along with a "pleasure pack" of Durex condoms, and I got a free bottle of mint-scented lube, by Durex as well... I think it was called, "Pleasure Play- Tingling" Hmm, my interest piqued, I quickly hopped to trying it out.. I rubbed some on Second String and well, what can I say, with the new batteries and my free bottle of mint lube, my world was officially rocked. My crib smelled like a pack of Doublemint Gum. Fabulous. Anyway, I don't mean to rant about masturbation so openly... but I think it's the greatest thing since the Dirty Martini. I love it. I can't understand how something that feels so good can make someone- (particularly women)- blush and feel ashamed of engaging in it. Needless to say, I entertain any suggestions as to any other new toy I may be missing out on. On that note, I'm gonna go pop an Altoid and finish my Red Bull.