Two Boxes of Douches and Snuggle Fabric Softener

Life is still sputtering along. I think I did well on my interview last Wednesday, but only a follow-up phone call will tell if I sold myself well enough. Needless to say, the search continues. And I'm hunting at a feverish pace, as my only other options are relocating, hooking, or relocating to hook. ...
Anyhow, two nights ago, while in my chariot (a.k.a. mass transit), a disheveled, drunkish looking man wearing the whitest pair of sneakers- (they struck a shocking, like-new contrast against his wrinkled black t-shirt, and dirty, faded black jeans)- stumbled on the bus balancing a cell phone against his ear, his fare, a plastic shopping bag, and his sobriety. He stood up front, reassuring whoever was on the other end of his call, that he was "on the bus now" and would "be there soon. bye!"
In awe of his super-white, squeaky clean, new sneakers, I broke my trance and noticed the contents of his bag... two boxes of Summer's Eve douche stacked on top of each other: Vinegar & Water and Island Splash (trust me, those were the varieties he purchased, because I'm familiar with the color code of each type of douche). Leaning against the douche boxes, completing the unusual menage a trois was a bottle of Snuggle fabric softener. I looked back up at the man... week old scruff served as a beard, his eyes were heavily lidded like he knocked back a few, and he leaned his back against a pole at the front of the bus, struggling to maintain his balance. He held on tight to his shopping bag though. Perhaps he needed to dull the pain of having to buy feminine douche and Snuggle, so he drank until he was numb? Just speculating...
Needless to say, I'm still a bit perplexed by what I spied.

3 comments

Dee said...

my husband once saw a homeless man wearing the same sneakers he had on.
The homeless man's sneakers were cleaner.

TiffJ said...

That's just wrong! LOL

Anonymous said...

BWAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!!! I have left you a message that you will cherish forever because of the sheer delight I've had reading this mess!!! LOL

;) Cat