Upon returning home last night, from the blogging course at Trinity College, I was exhausted. I could only muster up enough energy to change out of my clothes, eat a huge glob of Nutella, and to flop right on top of my bedspread. I couldn't even be bothered with turning down the covers. I didn't brush my teeth (which I would regret the following morning, as I smacked in disgust at the sour taste)- nor did I wash my face (which I hate not doing). I was tired. More importantly, I awoke from a rather fascinating dream this morning. Did the blog class prompt this dream? Nope. Probably not. Anyway, I shall walk thee through it... Or as much of it as I can remember anyway. (insert undulating scenario here) Two beautiful gay men, invited Cat and I to be guests on their yacht. Their lively little party boat of flowing spirits, platters of fruit & cheese, throbbing techno beats, and gyrating torsos. We jumped at the chance to be a part of it. "Where is it? Give us the directions!" I insisted. A little too excited for my own good. I ran to get some paper and a pen, to write down the directions. "It's in Morley, Massachusettes" says Main Gay1 "I'll beam you up. follow us." "Huh?" I said, not realizing what the hell MG1 was talking about. "Morley, Mass..." before I could ask whether or not there was a town called Morley in MA, MG1, MG2, and Cat rounded the corner. "Wait!" I yelled after them. But alas, it was two late. I saw the three disappear behind a shower of gold glitter. Large smiles plastered on their faces, was the last thing I saw. Dejected, I ran towards a computer in the room. I was adamant about getting to Morley, MA. I started to do a Yahoo! map search, when a white, midwesternish couple walked in the room. They looked like they swung. I've seem those documentaries. I know what they look like. "Hi" they both chirped. A little too happily. "Can I help you?" I asked, somewhat annoyed by their interruption. "We're tourists. We're doing this whole tour of New England, and we wanna go to Morley, MA too!" the woman said. "Um, you do realize this is gay stuff. Uptight sphincters and non-Hags need not apply" I said. "We know." says the man. He had a fake bake tan, a defined part on the left side of his head, and his teeth were so white, I swear I noticed one of those "ping" sparkles one sees on toothpaste commercials. Shrugging, I said, "Well, I was just about to do a map search. I'll see if I can get us there." I typed our destination in Yahoo! maps search. Successful, I hit print. Just when I ripped the paper from the Lexmark z11, MG1 and MG2 came back. "Come on, before it's too late. You still wanna come??" "YES!" I exclaimed, breathlessly. I walked at a clip, trying to keep up with MG1 and MG2. The Midwestern, swingerish looking couple, followed close behind. MG2 pushed opened this swinging door. We all piled in. Just before the golden shower (no pun intended)- swathed us in glitter, a whole horde of people men and women, some of whom were dressed in sparkly cocktail dresses and gowns, piled in with us. "Come on! Hurry up!" I said, annoyed. Just then, a whole group of grade school aged girls ran toward the door. Dressed in shirttails, ribbed knee socks, black oxfords, and plaid skirts. "NOOOO!" we all yelled, disapprovingly. One of the evening gown clad women held the door, to keep out the catholic school girls. The girls started banging on the door to be let in, to no avail. The woman, manicured hands and all, held on tight. Finally, the gold glitter shower rained down on us and we were transported to some alternate world of... well... hedonistic fun. A huge boat, filled with party-people. It was a like a toned down version of Caligula or something. There were gay men everywhere. Shirtless, muscles taut and gleaming. I was awestruck. Some gay Adonis came over, decked out in a gold lame toga. He pushed a tray full of rainbow colored cocktails toward me. Speechless, I took one. Just then, I spied Cat, sitting in the middle of the room, on a sunken, gold, velvet couch.... surrounded by and chatting, animatedly, with bright eyed gay men. "Hi." I said. Annoyed that she had settled in without me. The first thing Cat said to me was, "Did you blot?" "What?" I asked, irritated. "Did you blot??? "Who cares!" I said. "You need to blot." She insisted. Grumbling and annoyed, I stomped to the bathroom, pulled out my compact of tea tree oil facial blotting tissues, and blotted my shiny nose. Upon coming back, I saw that practically everyone was on the dance floor, now. Arms flailing, legs and pelvises undulating in time with rapid techno beats. Colorful glitter covered the floor. Feet moved and stomped fervently. Not needing to be told, I joined in. Eyes closed, arms raised in the air, syncopated rhythms taking me away. All of a sudden, everything slowed down. I, along with everyone else, was moving in slow motion. Good times... good times! I woke up. Sitting up in bed, I slid my tongue over my dirty, unbrushed teeth. What a dream. What it means, I'm not exactly sure. Shrugging, I got up to brush my teeth.