NOT.The.One

Dear Life,
Alright, I get it! My tenacity has rubbed you the wrong way.  In fact, my resilience has driven you to test me over and over and over again. Almost to the point that I feel as if I've become your official whipping post.  Now, I was emphatic about starting this new year off to a great start... all around. But alas, to no avail, because you're constantly picking on me. Don't you have any con artists and sketchy characters to teach a lesson?
It wasn't enough that you stomped on my fingers repeatedly while I was desperately hanging onto that window's ledge for leverage a couple of years ago, feet flailing beneath me... desperate for firm footing, because you wanted me to fall onto hard concrete... a broken heap. When that didn't work...when I managed to pull myself up and in... throbbing fingertips and all... you withered away, shrieking like an exorcised banshee... vowing to come back to kick my ass.
Listen, this latest kick to the gut and ribs left me rolling on the floor, clutching my sides in pain. I was not expecting that type of assault. So why continue the onslaught while I'm down? I'm struggling. Crawling. Dragging myself across the floor, in an effort to ward off your attack and stand back up, and you reeled back with your stiletto heel, pointed to perfection- (hey, Karmic bitches need to look fly too)- and administered one final, sharp kick. I thought that one would cause me to projectile vomit all the fight I had left in the pit of my stomach, all over the walls. I was able to choke it back down, however. I curled up in a fetal position to ward off your wild attack as best as I could... as you flailed your fists, shrieked, spat, and stomped like a petulant toddler. I'm still in shock... my ribs and sides are still quite sure from that last kick. But I was still able get back up... and stagger to a safe corner to plot my next move and get my bearings and second wind back.
I'm still mulling. I'm still plotting. A little defeated and bruised... but up and pondering my next move. 

xoxo
Coffey


5 comments

Mikki Lee said...

Your post was fun to read. :)

Ahavah Olam said...

The picture of this post reminded me of magic the gathering artist Phil Foglio. I was hoping someone else remembered the game, but I found something more.

Your post is very reminiscent of the laments of psalms, and it looks like you searching for some kind of internal answer. Good luck on that endeavor.

I do offer you some reading, as I see you like to read (and I have a written a book or two) but my work is crap compared to what I bring to you. It's a quick read but the most powerful and inspirational works, probably ever written.

Proverbs, Ecclesiastes, and the Song of Solomon. They three books in the bible and they aren't preachy at all, in fact the first is truisms, the second is respective nihilism, and the third is a very beautiful and mysterious love story between a man and a woman.

I wish you success on your job hunt and even more success in your spiritual search inward.

:)

TiffJ said...

@mikkilee- Thank you for visiting! Your blog is quite compelling too!

@Will-- Thanks for the suggestions. I actually read 'Song of Solomon' several times... I'm assuming you're referring to Toni Morrison's novel. I've read much of her work, for the most part. Thanks for visiting! ;-)

Ahavah Olam said...

Actually I was referring to the book of the bible by the same name. It just predates her by a few hundred years.

I have heard a lot of good things about Mrs.Morrison's work and I might have to pick up something for work.

I want another Blue Like Jazz, a book that I didn't want to put down and ended up devouring it whilst I was working.

Song of Solomon is considered perhaps the greatest prophetic book, even moreso than the personal self help book of revelations. Remember the goal of life is to find your way to communicate to your own soul. It's yours and no one elses, its not the satan's(which is hebrew for the enemy, i know not as cool right?) or even Jesus'. You can loan its service, but according to your own life YOU have all the control, ALL the power.

The world is yours to discover.
:) You'll find more answers in your own soul then all the stars in the sky or gains of sand on all the planets combined.

TiffJ said...

@Will -- Duly noted. Once again, thanks for your insight and for visiting.