Bloody, Comic Valentine

Despite the onslaught of winter's fury this past Sunday, I am feeling a little less melancholy. I am still fed up with the frigid air, the stresses of everyday life, and having to dress in constrictive layers. But I don't feel as moody. I am going to hold off posting the first chapter of "The Uprising" because I have to do some last minute, historical research. Perhaps if I could tear myself away from the trainwreck known as VH1's Flavor of Love for a minute, I could build on the discipline a writer is supposed to have. Flavor of Love... Ahhh, loooove. Let's talk about V-day for a spell... Valentine's Day is tomorrow, the best way to react is to simply disregard it altogether. Pretend it simply doesn't exist. I read a column in the local paper recently, bemoaning the annoyance known as Valentine's Day. Liz Tuccillo, who co-authored the dating do and don't literary hit, "He's Just Not that Into You" deemed it a "painful holiday" upon calling directory assistance for a phone number only to be met by a greeting wishing callers "Happy Valentine's Day." Tuccillo did not appreciate having to be reminded that she is indeed, just another single, with no one to ring this useless holiday in with. The article also goes on to say that even those who are fortunate enough to be in relationships loathe Valentine's Day because there is this immense pressure to buy a loved one a proper gift... the pressure is likened to the Christmas holiday. It creates a thick layer of stress and tension... "Oh, chocolates and flowers, again, Thaaanks honey" a girlfriend or wife might retort, a forced saccharine smile dancing across her face... her eyes burning with pure venom, for she wanted that 32 carat, plantinum, star pendant with round, brilliant diamonds, on a 16 inch chain, from Tiffany. She'd only oooohed and awwwwed over it 2 months prior, hoping to plant the seed of "bling bling" in your head. One 25 year old, interviewed for the article lamented: "It's got that added layer of romance. Just one more thing to make you feel inadequate." As much as I hate to rain on the parade of every hopeless romantic, I'm inclined to agree... and I swear that it's not because I'm chronically single. I just think that people shouldn't wait one day a year to make their significant others feel as if they matter. I also don't think it's fair for people to expect their paramours to drop significant amounts of money on them, to prove that they care. We live in a culture where we are made to feel guilty and self-conscious for not buying the biggest, the best, and the most expensive, particularly when these ridiculous holidays role around. Think about it! Even when we were wee lads and lasses in grade school... some of us had to sit by idly, and sadly as Jane, Jill, and Jack got hundreds of those tiny little Valentine's Day cards featuring Strawberry Shortcake and various other of our favorite cartoon characters, wishing one and all a Happy Valentine's Day, while you got one or none. The one handed out to everyone, from the teacher never really counting as being legitimate. It's the equivalent of hateful brainwashing, really. Consider the history of Valentine's day, which is for the most part, shrouded in mystery, but most certainly, ends in death and tragedy. Nothing romantic about some martyr saint getting beheaded for some cause celebre, or however the legend goes. I hate Valentine's Day, point-blank-period. I probably always will. I could never fathom putting that kind of pressure on any prospective paramour, I may (or may not at this rate) end up with. I'm of the opinion that gifts are always best received when you least expect them. February 15th is a different matter altogether, for that is when the candy and chocolates go on sale!

9 comments

Anonymous said...

I agree that it's stupid to wait until Valentine's, someone's birthday or Christmas to do something nice for those you love, whatever their relation to you may be. However, I still enjoy those days just because it's nice to have the chance to make a person feel special...I think it's all in how you approach holidays. Many make it out to be a damn show or they screw it up and pretend that it's because they don't like them.

I buy that you don't like them because I know you. I also realize that there are a number of others that completely are with you and rightfully so. I just think that it should be something you WANT to do, not a freakin' obligation. These days are set aside to line the pockets of a number of different industries, but SHOULD AND COULD BE USED as a quick fun day with those you enjoy being with the most. Who needs couple cyash cyash and bizzle bazzle bling when you can gankbank and eat up day-after-V-Day chocolates on Feb. 15 or buy up all the cool clothes you want on the 26th of Dec.? It should be FUN, not FORCED.

- Cyet

Amadeo said...

Not a fan of the day. I won't knock people for celebrating, but I will knock alot of the lack of originality in the gifts.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, a little originality goes a long way.

Anonymous said...

I completely agree with you. I think a lot of holidays suck!!! Valentine's Day generally makes anyone who is not in a relationship feel the impact of I'M SINGLE, but if one does have a mate and does not receive anything, it makes that person feel like they are not loved. Sickening. However, I have decided that I am going to have victory in my singleness. Because if truth be known, most people in relationships are miserable or nonchalant. Very few people in relationships are content. Some readers might disagree, but if they think about everyone they know who are in a relationship, how many are truly happy. I say that Valentine's Day should be blown off the calendar, forever. Because even if I were in a lovingly, committed relationship, I surely wouldn't wait for a particular day to let my significant other know that I love him. If two people really love each other, Just Because gifts and cards are a lot more significant than something someone bought because of a particular holiday.

Your cousin
JaeInVA

msjaim said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
msjaim said...

um, my ex gave me a stuffed animal and some chocolates...eh?

Unknown said...

you funny

i am sure if a brother came through and hooked you up with some chocolate and roses, it would be a different song and dance..

TiffJ said...

Cat: I agree about the all day gankbanking. That'd be gift enough for me!

Amadeo: I agree. Red Roses are played... and it screams "LAST MINUTE GIFT" tee hee. People should mix it up a little w/ the flowers. Buy their loved one some wildflowers buy a bouquet that's unusual but beautiful.

Anonymous: Ditto.

Cuz Jan: I agree wholeheartedly! Just because gestures are so meaningful. Not gifts per se, but anything, like bringing home takeout and a bottle of wine.

MsJaim: Hmmm... interesting. Hope you didn't share the chocolates with him!

Bro Omi: Very funny. hahaha.

emeralda said...

i agree with you coffeey and obi too though.
being a european in america and in a relationship all that for the first time really i can say: valentines day is funny! we don't celebrate it like that over there at home. not me at least. but i also never had someone to celebrate it with. who cares.
so my boyfriend and i agree to not care about this freaking day. still we can't totally avoid wishing each other 'happy valentines day' whatever that means. it s sweet how he says it, with one eyebrow raised, irnoically a little.
but then....a surprise gift would have - ahm, MADE me happy! something like what introspectre wrote about a past boyfriend: he bought tickets to a piano concert because he knew how much she loves piano music. thats cool and man, obi is right, when you get a gift you still feel somewhat pleased. then again, i totally agree that giving gifts and appreciation and attention should never be reserved for a day. i never buy really xmas gifts and all that but when i see today sth that i know will make you happy i ll buy it.
for my boyfriend i made a arm bracelet (i designed a pattern that had two hearts in it, woohoo!) for xmas and little things like that would make me happy too.
but you don't want to demand anything either. so it s alltogether a bit ambiguous and all that but i tell you, this pressure is so rediculous.
my suggestion is to make that day a real holiday so people can actually take time for each other, because this is undoubtedly a good thing, and they should trade this in for presidents day and let people go work on presidents day. who wants a day off for the president? ahahaha. the point is, if it was named valentines day people would probably really try to make time or go and hunt somebody tee hee. but presidents day? probably the guy would mumble, honey, sorry, i gotta do this and that it s presidents day and she could never say 'BUT IT IS VALENTINES DAY~!'
you know?

love
piranha

ps. we went to subways.